Wednesday, June 22, 2016

The Book(s)

Yesterday I went shopping at our local Goodwill Outlet Store with two of my friends. We've made this a regular weekly occurrence because the shopping experience at this store is addicting. And frightening.
It's addicting because you never know what you might find so the several hours on end spent looking through bins of rubbish (Jason says the Goodwill Outlet is where Goodwill goes to die) could make you a millionaire couple bucks richer. It's frightening because there are rules and people that don't obey the rules. Let me explain.
The workers wheel out about 6 large bins that are heaping full of either clothing items or non clothing items. All clothing related bins are on one side of the store all non-clothing related bins are on the other side, lined up in rows. So. Again, the workers wheel out a row of bins. During this time, shoppers have to line up behind the yellow line and stand and never cross the yellow line until a worker yells "shop". I'm not making this up. If you reach into a bin, cross the yellow line or are trying desperately to peer into a bin to see what's in it, you get yelled at, and the more extreme workers will kick you out. (I personally wish this would happen more often because that leaves more stuff for me). 
When the worker yells "shop" hands go flying into the bins snatching things out at a record pace. I have been stepped on, had things thrown on me, had things snatched out of my hands and had people tell me they would "flip me" for an item that I wanted just to have them take it for themselves. It's crazy business people! But don't you want to go now for the adventure?
You pay by the pound, which is why it's an outlet. After an allotted amount of time, other Goodwill stores have their unsold items sent here, and then what doesn't sell at the outlet goes to recycling. That's why it's so cheap. This Goodwill Outlet however, is also a donation center.This is why you never know what you'll find, some items have not been picked over at another store. 
Jason hates it. 
My first find yesterday was this assembly of Cabbage Patch Dolls.
And when I say assembly, I mean like the Avengers only with less super powers and more pacifiers.
I paid $8.00 total for these dolls. The doll on the bottom right with the jacket and jeans recently sold on ebay for $32.00 and that doll didn't have shoes. I made $45 dollars selling the dolls.
On my way out of the store we came across a large box full of bags that we determined were free for people to use to put all of their items in. That's when we found this:
That's a brand new Thirty-One brand thermal tote that's never been opened. Free! I sold it for $5 because I'm a philanthropist.
My true excitement of the day came when I was scrounging around in a bin of books that no one cared about. I found a small red book that looked old and on the side it said "The Works of Edgar Allen Poe Vol. V". To which I thought "huh, that's interesting" and I held onto it and continued digging. Then I found a few more and my friend Stephanie's dad asked me if he could see one of the books. He took it and did some research while I continued searching through the bin. Once I decided I had turned over every stinking book in the bin, they told me that what I had found was books 4-10 (IV-X to be exact) of the original first edition 1845 Edgar Allen Poe series. 
I put them back in the bin because I decided I didn't want them. 
Just kidding.
I paid $2 total for the books. I sold them on a FaceBook site for $50 because I had no clue what they were worth (clearly more than $50 because I had at least 50 people lined up to purchase them and at least 5 more who sent me a private message asking if they could buy them). But I needed  to make a quick buck because I promised Dawson I would buy him a set of Legos after he returns from Church Camp as an incentive for him to stay. -He hasn't wanted to do a sleepover ever since he had a bad experience at an all nighter back in February. That had the potential of being the longest run-on sentence ever.
*Side note*: I have to wear gloves when I shop at the outlet so that:
1. I don't die from germs
2. I don't die from having my fingers cut off on broken glass that is sometimes protruding in the bottom of the bins.
3. I don't die from OCD because I hate how dirty my hands feel after digging through all the germs. If I ever worked as a cashier at Walmart I'd be the one with the plastic gloves scanning your items.
 Speaking of books.
Jason has a co-worker who recently wrote and released his own book.  His name is Jim Ed Hardaway (he's cool like that with two first names).
Jim's book is titled: It Was That Dang Red-Headed Preacher's Kid! Episodes from My Whimsical Childhood. 
Jason had me order the book and I ordered a signed copy because when Jim is famous I will sell my autographed book on ebay and we'll be able to retire. Unless I forget about the book and it ends up at a Goodwill Outlet and some schmoe finds it and sells it on ebay and makes millions instead of me! (just kidding Jim, I'll sell it don't worry).
He came over to hand deliver our book and sign it in person, which means these photographs of me with Jim are probably worth at least $3.99.  Partially because I'm famous in my own right. My book I Wrote This Book. Is being published this fall.
Here's Jim signing the book. That's me holding up the stickers that came with the book and I forgot to suck in so please disregard that I didn't do my hair, had on clothes that came from a junk yard or suck in for this photo op.
 Then we told Dawson to take our picture with Jason because Jason wanted to be famous too and we wanted Jim to show his smiling face. Makes the picture worth more money.
I'm only halfway through the book and I've got to say, Jim cracks me up. And I know funny. You can order the book here. And then read it and laugh too!
Also, Jim has his own website (that has more info and a link to order his book) that shows off his creative cleverness which is almost better than mine.


kallingklan said...

Wow! I want to come shop with you at that Goodwill place! My hands felt dirty just reading about the bins so I'm glad you wear gloves too!

Stephanie Beaver said...

I was laughing by the first paragraph. Maybe we should video you in action. Don't forget Holly Hobby stalked you. LoL He git a kick out of that!

Carol Salter said...

Looking forward to the goodwill adventure tomorrow... Maybe I'll bring my Camera....