Monday, April 14, 2008

The Spankin'

Ahhh... how I love a child that causes a scene in the middle of a large store.
This is the tale of a little boy named Disobedient Dawson.

Yesterday morning I wasn’t feeling well so I took a day off work. As the day progressed I felt much better so I called in and told them I’d be coming in for the rest of the day in the afternoon and just be taking a ½ day off. I had a good portion of the morning left before I had to be in to work so Jason and I decided to take Dawson to Rural King to pet the bunnies. Shouldn’t there be an award for this? Maybe that’s called “Mother’s Day” & “Father’s Day”.
When we arrived at Redneck King, oops, Rural King, Jason said he saw the cages where the bunnies should be, but he didn’t see any animals in them! Not good!
Thankfully there happened to be one bunny left in his cage which Dawson prodded, poked, pet, and loved. But Dawson got bored with him quickly because I wouldn’t take him out of the cage. So Dawson takes off running to explore the store. Jason had to go find some parts or something for our lawnmower so I was left with the terror now taking over. Each time Dawson headed for something potentially hazardous I would pick him up and he would scream and kick and practically turn upside down in my arms to wiggle free. So I’d put him down and chase him again. Until… HE FOUND THEM. A whole shelf full of toy tractors, semi’s, cars, the entire loot of treasure was all his to pillage, plunder, and otherwise call his own. This is where he spent the rest of his time taking each toy off the shelf, driving it on the ground once, and continuing to do so until he had driven each and every toy on the shelf. Where on earth is Jason?, I began thinking. Probably in some corner laughing watching us and thinking it was funny what I was dealing with at the moment. But he wasn’t. He was talking to a worker to find out if the lawnmower parts he was planning to buy were the correct ones. Finally he comes walking over and we are ready to leave. So I let Jason take over and started out of the store. Here is his version of the drama that ensued:
I put the toys back on the shelf and Dawson started screaming. Then I grabbed him to head out, holding his kicking feet away from my- “any sensitive areas” (editor’s note:I had to edit that portion of Jason’s story) and told him we had to leave. Then Dawson looked right at me, yelled “NO” and slapped me in the face. So I put him down and gave him a good spanking!
And all the store got quiet…
Is this a tantrum at it’s finest? Why do baby Einstein movies not include this drama in their videos?
Here is MY version of the drama that ensued:
I left Dawson with the toys and let Jason take over. And I practically ran for the door to leave. The next thing I know I hear screaming and shouting by a certain toddler who shall remain nameless, but I didn’t look back. I had a goal. The EXIT sign was just ahead. Then all of a sudden the whole store stops what they are doing, grows very still and looks right in my direction to the scene going on behind me, so I turned around to see what was happening. And by that point, I had missed the NO, the slap, and the spanking. Clearly the exit sign had a strong magnetic pull on me up to this point. And within 2 seconds of looking back we were ALL out of store. Though I don’t remember who got out first now. It’s all a blur…
And that’s the true life adventures of the nice parents who took their son to pet the bunnies.

Of course, after stories like that, I always have to share at least one cute one to counterbalance and create wholeness in my blogging world.
This morning Jason called me at 8:30 and said he went into Dawson’s room to grab some diapers for the diaper bag, but Dawson still hadn’t woken up from all the noise. So Jason walked over to his crib to check on him. Dawson was breathing real heavy so Jason assumed he was still in a deep sleep. Then Dawson turned over and looked up and said “Daddy!” And Jason said “What Dawson” to which Dawson replied “I ready to wake up now!” So Jason got him up.

All that said, here is a non-related video that makes me laugh. Briana took it while we were staying at their house over Easter.
And last but not least... We have a WINNER!!
Jodi, you win the prize for knowing what Tabgha is-A city near Galilee known to be the place where Jesus fed the 5,000. (see my 7 random facts post and comments) even if it WAS sort of kind of cheating. But I'll let you win because no one even bothered to guess. And now for the revealing of the prize!...
(batteries not included)


Holly said...

Thank you Joy for making me feel like a good parent! Ha, just kidding of course. Aren't those tantrums just lovely? I think they exist for the purpose of making sure our blood flow works properly (or at least IS flowing). I especially love it when onlookers act like they have NEVER seen another kid cry.
Welcome to this lovely phase of parenthood--more to come! :-)

Holly said...

hey where's the delete option?? oh well, guess you'll just have to suffer through reading TWO identical comments..

The Flick Family said...

you do know about the lady who spanked her kid at kohls and got put in jail....uh-oh! so if any police cars come pulling up to the house, you'll know why! ha!!!! isn't parenting humbling?

p.s. WHERE are the pictures of my daughter and your son together???? why has this not made it onto your blog yet?

Joy ☺ said...

There Holly,
I deleted the comment for you, so that I wouldn't have to suffer. ha ha! just kidding. :)

Gloria said...

That boy takes after his DAD!


Anonymous said...

I think that when either me or Kelsey were little we did the same thing to our parents. We slapped them in the face...i don't remember it tho, guess that's a good thing.haha.