The Moped Gang

We have numerous middle-aged men in our vicinity who ride mopeds. By the looks of things, this is due, largely in part, to some violation of the law. Such as, but not limited to: drunken driving, driving with a suspended license, driving without insurance and the list could go on and on I'm sure. Actually, I'm only assuming that this list is equal to the crime of driving a moped. Will these crimes get your driving privelages taken away? Because if you're a middle aged man and you're reduced to driving a moped as your main source of transportation, that should be a crime. I think I have cousins in this predicament.

Of course this is all speculation.

But here's the kicker.

They also all wear hats and Carhart jackets. In the spring and summer. I don't understand this? Is this middle-aged man moped code? Is this a by-law?

And where are the women? There have to be women who have been sentenced with the same violations and yet I don't see any of them on mopeds. Maybe they sent their moped husbands out to get the job done?

In case you are ever in this situation, here is the most popular choice:

This has nothing to do whatsoever with the purpose of this post. My initial intention was to blog about my sisters. So I'll do that now instead.

If my sisters read this blog, they'd kill me for this. But they don't, so I'm in the clear. All except for my sister B who wouldn't kill me because she lives too far away and I can run faster than she can. That's not proven, but I bet I can.

There was one day we were all at our mom's house and just decided to do our hair.

This was a LONG time ago. Back when I was skinnier and had checkered shorts. And thought being more highlighted would be instant access to celebrities if they were ever in town.

This is what family is about right here. Even if you're brothers.

As you can plainly see, my sister's A and K are tanning queens and can tan for 20 minutes their first tanning day of the summer and look like a bronze goddess.

On the other hand, Me and my sister B, must start out at 3 minutes, carefully guarding our proneness to burn by jumping out of the tanning bed at the 2 minute 30 second mark if need be.

I don't even know how to end this post, it's so random.

5 Things

What are five things on your to-do list for today?

1. Sort through math materials with our math consultant.

2. Talk to some guy about the payment agreement on our contract for a speaker who’s coming.

3. Poop

4. Call and clear up the whole drama with my contacts *see story below

5. Go see “Get Smart”

What are five snacks you enjoy?

1. Buffalo chicken dip with Tostitos

2. cheese and crackers

3. crackers with butter

4. Pringles

5. string cheese

What are five things you would do if you were a billionaire?

1. Tithe

2. Travel. All over the world.

3. Give money to my family

4. Do missions work in some way

5. Pay off bills

What are five of your bad habits?

1. Who said I have bad habits?

2. I save my gum which means I lay anywhere even thought it’s been chewed

3. I forget to the check the shower curtain causing a puddle of water on the bathroom floor

4. sometimes I bite my nails

5. sometimes I forget to put food away and it will just sit out overnite. Yuck!

What are five places you have lived?

1. Wawaka

2. Ligonier

3. Mishawaka

4. Avilla

5. I will add one more to this list someday if I have my way

What are five jobs you’ve had?

1. part-time secretary/worship leader at a church

2. media assistant in a library at a school

3. receptionist at a tanning salon

4. food service and custodian in college

5. administrative assistant in a school

What five people do you want to tag?

1. Steph

2. Mindy

3. Briana

4. Kelsey

5. Kristin

Now if you might indulge me for just a minute and let me speak about my latest drama.
I bought a years supply of contacts. That includes 4 boxes of contacts for my left eye and 4 boxes of contacts for my right because I have astigmatism. Tell me right off the bat, is that confusing? Because it sounds cut and dry to me. 4 boxes for my left eye, 4 boxes for my right eye. Capiche?
Whoa! Slow down Nelly! Wal-Mart can’t handle that!
See, about 3 weeks ago I went in, got my eye exam and Wal-Mart ordered my contacts. They said they’d be in within 7 to 10 business days. I got the call that they came in so I went and got them, paid, and went home. Never bothered to look in the bag because I trusted that what I ordered was in the bag. Contacts for my left eye. Contacts for my right eye. And, to top it all off, I could send the box tops in for a nifty $50.00 rebate! But I got home, but the bag of contacts away and forgot about the whole thing. I had my free trial pair in which can last a whole month so I didn’t bother. Until… Monday my left contact was really bothering me. I think it tore, so I just took both contacts out and threw them away thinking I would just start with my new ones. So I get the bag of contacts out just to realize that they gave me only 4 bags of contacts for my left eye. No contacts for my right eye. None. Grrr… So I start rummaging through the house tyring to think where I would have put the bag with the contacts for my right eye. I mean, my right eye would really get jealous knowing that my left eye could see and it could not. Then I remembered that the one small bag was all I got. So I called immediately explained my situation and the girl on the phone assured me she would take care of it. She ordered my contacts while we were on the phone saying she was ordering me trial pairs and when I asked her about the box tops for the rebate she said “she’d get me some”. I think she’s a member of the optometry mafia. Done. I hung up the phone relieved. However, I was still without contacts because I threw the other one’s away. So Tuesday I called and talked to the same girl who said she would set out a trial right eye for me to come and pick up for free. Fair enough. I got to get my contact and I explain the situation the girl who greeted me to see if she could go ahead and give me the box tops so I could get the rebate sent in. But she looked at me like I was nuts. (apparently she’s not a member of the eye care mafia) She looked up the order the other girl had placed for me and saw that she ordered me one contact. ONE. ?????? Then she said she had no clue how this other girl is going to get me box tops if she only ordered me trial pairs anyway. I hung my head in despair. (Because I’m good with drama like that). Then the girl gave me a left contact for free because she felt bad. So I knew my drama display was helping me out. Then she suggested I call on Friday to talk to the girl who had originally made all the arrangements. And today is Friday and that is what I’ll be doing. My contacts had better be free. And the box tops better be smiling at me when I receive them.

In-laws

You are about to embark on quite possibly the funniest thing ever. From my perspective of course.

Jason's parents were able to come out and visit for a while a few weeks ago. We love having them here. Dawson does especially because he gets presents and lots of attention! And because they were here, I was able to meet Jason and some friends at King's Island for a day fritting myself away and being jerked around by wild rides. Quite entertaining. Actually, that's a whole story in itself. We were chased and dive bombed by these nasty locusts called cicadas. (prounounced su-kae-duhs-I had to look that word up online because I had no clue how to spell it. See, I do my research.) We got caught in the middle of a huge thunderstorm and then spent the rest of the afternoon wet, cold and happy because we were cicada free and everyone left the park so we got on rides in five seconds flat. Big tangent.

So, back to my original story. I couldn't wait to introduce Wii to the in-laws. And of course, the first thing we did was create a Mii for each of them. Gloria's Mii looked nothing like her, but Greg... oh my goodness. You must brace yourself for the funniness of which you are about to partake

Greg's Mii is named Gregorio. We think he looks like Juan Valdez, the Columbian coffee guy. And for the first 10 minutes of their first game of golf, I laughed until I cried each time Greg was up to golf. So I was determined to get a picture of his Mii character to post on the internet for all the world to enjoy. And there it is. Oh man. I still laugh.

Gloria out of nowhere was actually kicking butt at bowling. And she screamed with glee after each strike even though Dawson was napping. She couldn't contain her excitement.

One evening my sister Anita and her husband Jose were in town and stopped by to see us, so they got in on the Wii action. I was busting up laughing because Jose really gets into his bowling stance!

I have lots of video of their stay. Take a look...

Before getting all caught up in the New York strip steaks at the end of this video clip, take a moment to really notice Jason's shirt.

Jason taught Dawson the appropriate form for a runner to take at the beginning of a race.

Thanks, Greg & Gloria for the fun and laughs while you were here!

Dawson Gregory

Dawson one day just blurted out his first and middle name while he was eating supper. So of course I had to get it on video:

There is no good transition to move from that to his "Doo Doo". Not his poopy or anything else you can think of. It's what he does when he looks at himself in the mirror. He gets all goofy and shows off for himself. He's just like his daddy! Actually, Jason is the one who picks him up and puts him up on my dresser so that Dawson can see himself. Then he and Dawson make goofy faces and crack themselves up.

Not too long ago Jason and I took Dawson to the zoo. We packed a lunch and ate in the park before heading into the zoo. We saved our scraps to feed the ducks. Though one duck was determined to sneak some food underhandedly before we finished. Til I Kung Fu'ed him right before he took the food. Not really. I wouldn't kung fu a duck. Here's pics of Dawson feeding the ducks.

Here's Dawson and I cuddling on the couch after a hot day at the zoo!
Who knows when this picture was taken, but this is a rainbow Jason saw right outside our house recently. God's promise that he wouldn't flood our house, just the neighbor's. Just kidding!

And now there's this story...

The other day I was changing Dawson's diaper and he was in a goofy mood so I was pinching his belly. Then he got grumpy all of a sudden and each time I would pinch him he would give me a dirty look and say "eh" real whiney and mean. Then he looks me square in the eye and on my honor he says this:

"spider gonna get you"

WHA?!

Of course I went to bed terrified that a spider was going to bite me and poison me and all my limbs would rot off. Because that happens you know.

You would have never thought that something so unpleasant would have come off the lips of this:

Father's Day

Hip Hip Hooray for Father's Day! Serioiusly. Should I write poetry?

This year Father's Day was extra special because Jason's mom and dad got to be with us. More stories on their visit are coming. And trust me, there are some things you don't want to miss!

Father's day morning I took Dawson and we went to visit my dad. Gramps. or "gwamps" as Dawson calls him.

The 1st few pictures were not actually taken on father's day. It was a week before, but I was at my dad's so I'm including them in with Father's Day pics. I'm the boss. The 2nd half were taken on Father's Day.

Dawson played "pound it" with dad and I watch this video over and over because it makes me laugh.

My dad held the camera up for me for this picture because I kept releasing the battery when I tried. He should be a photographer, don't ya think?

Look at this stinkin adorable outfit that Gramma G and Grandpa Wilkins bought for Dawson. He looks a little too grown up for me though. So he's not allowed to wear it again. just kidding.

When I got home it was time to give Greg and Jason their Father's Day gifts. Greg got a stud finder which curiously began beeping at him. I think it's broken. Jason got a watch, a new IMAX ocean video and about half a cow from this awesome butcher shop that we have near us. We will be eating steak for the next 2 weeks. New York strip to be exact.

Pictures of the father's and sons:

Why are 90% of the pictures of Jason shirtless? Is it drawn out of him because of the area in which we live?

Anyway,

We had a great Father's Day.

I did even though I'm not a dad.

Look What I got!

That's right. I got an ant farm. And for any of you hoodlums out there that think you can graffiti my excitement, I've got news for you (hey but first, I gotta say, that line I just used "graffiti my excitement" -that was pretty good wasn't it?!) there's nothing that can stand in the way of me and my ants.

I've always wanted an ant farm. I've never actually seen an ant farm in person, but when I saw the kits at the store I wanted one of my very own. And I wanted the ants to build lots of tunnels! So one day while Jason and I were at Hobby Lobby, I asked him if he cared if I bought an ant farm. So I did. Then I sent in for the ants... and now I'M OFFICIAL:

I carry this around in my wallet.

After 3 or more long weeks, my ants arrived in this little tube. We had clear instructions to put them in the refrigerator for about 15 minutes before dumping them right into the farm so that they wouldn't be all hyper and stuff. There's no stopping a hyper ant.

I had to dump the sand into the bottom of the farm and Jason got upset because nearly half of it landed on the table like he thought it would because I'm a klutz. So we went back to Hobby Lobby and bought another farm to get more sand but ended up using the second farm too. Though I don't have a picture. We connected the two farms and now the ants run back and forth between the connectors doing their business. They're fun to watch and I wasn't homeschooled. They build tunnels and talk to each other in groups using their antannae and stack piles of sand which Jason thinks is a conspiracy because they want to get out. Complex creatures I tell you. I want to know if they sleep. Here's Dawson's reaction:

I'm gonna bet you all want ant farms now, don't you?

Landscaping 101

I'm ba-ck! I was deeply entangled in this thing called work. If you don't have to work, I don't recommend it. I'd much rather get paid to blog. Any takers on that? Call me.

So I have a lot to catch up on! But no worries, I won't make this the world's longest blog post and attach a bazillion photos. Though if there were a contest, or a possible entry into Guisness book of World Records for that, I might consider it.

Let's get started!

Several weeks ago Jason and I decided to relandscape our front yard. Though we had no clue what we were doing. We just drove around neighborhoods scoping out ideas of landscaping we liked. I'm sure we looked like neighborhood stalkers, driving real slowly and pointing out the car window at plants or mulch. But who cares? Now our yard looks better than theirs! Hey. That rhymed.

Once we had in mind what we thought we liked we headed to the nursery to pick out plants, trees, mulch, rock and other such landscaping items. The things I liked, Jason didn't. Things Jason liked, I didn't. But it was hot that day and we were both ready to get this done we so just grabbed some random things and left. No I'm kidding. We finally found some plants we agreed on. Jason actually had several sketches all drawn out of the landscaping. They really looked nice. -I think he used a ruler! And after about 4 grueling hours of digging, planting, laying down mulch and stone here are the before and after results:

BEFORE: (ugly)

AFTER: (stupendous)

The tree is a Nishiki something or other, then there's magic carpet on either side of the big princess plant and then to the far right is a burning bush. Moses would be proud.

They're hard to see, but if you look closely at the pictures of the plants by the garage door (there is one on each side) we had decided to plant a little bush/tree thing (technical terms of course) called a "boxwood poodle". It's so cute! I took a picture of one at the nursery because we went once and just took pictures of the plants we liked, then came home and sorted through all of them making final decisions. This is what a boxwood poodle looks like:

Isn't it a cutie-patootie?! They do have to be trimmed. I'm all for a high-maintenance cute plant.

And lastly, let me leave you with a memorable image:

Jason wore his favorite tank top the day we landscaped.

I highly recommend Solarcaine if this ever happens to you...